That said, I agree with them. Smores are already so sweet they make your teeth hurt, so what’s the point of wasting your expensive maple syrup? What, does the vinegar cut the sweetness and make the toothache go away? And smores are already so rich that you’re full after two or three bites, so what does the bacon really add, besides a bunch of salt? Even as a perpetually-skinny (genes, not any virtue of my own), devoted fat-and-protein lover, my objection is more aesthetic than dietetic: there’s a time and a place for bacon — many times and places, actually — but marshmallows are not it.

Bake me a cake instead, Megna!

PS. Do you do quickbreads (sans bacon; half the students are from Saudi Arabia)? I try to bring breakfast on the mornings we have tests.