Epic Portions

Category: Randoms

  • Gummy Bears = My Kind of Medicine!

    Start your morning off right!
    Start your morning off right with a handful of these puppies!

    Gummy bears have been getting a bad rap lately, what with all the death and horror seen in the last post.  However, according to a pharmacist friend, if you double the dose of these kids vitamins – voila! – you’ve got yourself a nice multi-vitamin.  Now, this advice may be completely wrong and kill me someday – but at least I can’t wait to take my vitamins.

    For you ladies – the calcium vitamins resemble the consistency of sour-patch kids, but still sweet.  Candy that’s good for you?!  I got a case from CostCo and I’m ready to live forever.

  • Gummy Bears = Pure Evil

    I was always under the impression that Gummy Bears were simply a delicious and fruity snack.  It turns out, according to Google Images, these bears are murdering psychopaths.

    gummy

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    The worst thing seems to be the Bears’ lack of remorse for these killings.  Observe:

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    What the hell.

  • Hot Sauce – “Made with Conviction”

    This is awesome.  Anyone remember that simpsons episode where Homer eats the Guatemalan Insanity Pepper, goes all trippy, and discovers himself?

    The merciless peppers of Quetzalacatenango… grown deep in the jungle primeval by the inmates of a Guatemalan insane asylum.
    The merciless peppers of Quetzalacatenango… grown deep in the jungle primeval by the inmates of a Guatemalan insane asylum.

    Forget Guatemala!  According to CNN, the inmates of the HillsoborughCounty Jail are making hot sauce – and you can buy some from www.jailhousefire.org.  Don’t be surprised if you find a sprinkle of crack in there, though!  I mean…it is prison and this ain’t no license plate!

    Not sure how appropriate the Ad campaign is, but…whatever.

    04_bomb