Keep that fridge stocked for the ladies, fellas!

Beer/Drinks, Funny

I haven’t giggled this hard in a while.  I don’t know how I haven’t seen this, but I guess this is super old (like 2008!).  Mr. Chi City’s fantastic guide to making women comfortable when they come back to your place.  “Even when they bring they kids!”

Watch until the end for this gem:

…oh yeah, one more thing.  To the makers of kool aid, would you niggas stop putting the juice all the way to the top?!  Cause when I twist the motherfucking cap, the shit explodes like a goddamn grenade.   Then I got blue juice all over my white carpet.  Look, I appreciate you trying to give me as much juice for the value, but look – put the juice down here and I won’t miss it.  I mean these motherfuckers are like 5 for a dollar.  Thank you.

Tears.  Truth. (NSFW/language)

FULL English Breakfast. Let the bodies hit the floor…

Competitive Eating, Fat Foods, Funny, Travels

…haven’t heard that song in forever, have you?  Neither had I.  However, while rapidly consuming my first FULL ENGLISH BREAKFAST this last weekend in the quaint English Countryside, Drowning Pool’s turn-of-the-millennium one hit wonder crept into the outskirts of my mindbrain.  Why you ask?

Beaten why for (why for)
Can’t take much more
Here we go!

Not enough meat.

In retrospect: not enough carbs.  Needs less black pudding and more mushrooms and tomatoes.  Never thought I’d say that.

Let the bodies hit the flooooor;
Push me again;
This is the end;

Three hours later.   Sun shining.  Children playing.  Birds Tweeting.

…Stomach rumbling.

One – Something’s got to give;
Two – Something’s got to give;
Three – Something’s got to give;
Let the bodies hit the floor!

Ugh.  Gastrointestinal signals have told me to lay off black pudding for the next year or 6.  I mean, heavens, think of the children!

The Truth About British Food

London, Travels

2016-07-24 13.54.32

Dog and Gun: True to it's name

Dog and Gun: True to it’s name

British cuisine has a bad rap.  No one ever says they are going to England for the food.  How could this really be the case with things like lamb pie, succulent gravy and lightly fried fish are national staples?  This past weekend we traveled to the Lake District and northern England and committed indulging in only British fare.  Here are a few samplings from my favorite pub in Keswick, the Dog & Gun.  Todd got their famous goulash, which was fantastic, but undersalted.

Famous goulash! Fantastic. Needs salt.

Famous goulash! Fantastic. Needs salt.

Honestly, it was delicious.  Though I’m not a big fan of peas, I really enjoyed all of my meals, English breakfasts included.  Even a fast food meat and onion pie near the train station in Penrith was delicious.

Sunday roast: Mash, veggies, beef, yorkshire pudding (like a chunk of bready goodness). Not enough gravy.

Sunday roast: Mash, veggies, beef, yorkshire pudding (like a chunk of bready goodness).                                                                                       Not enough gravy.

What are the roots of this negative British culinary reputation?  I actually had this conversation today with someone.  Likely this stems from war time when the country was rationing every ounce of nourishment and had no capacity to focus on cooking.  I would imagine hunkering down in an air raid shelter during WWII, no one was thinking, “Man, that was a bland dinner.”

So I’m here to say, British food is misunderstood.  It’s delicious and I’ll be having a lot more while I’m here in London this year.  And don’t forget that Indian, one of the best cuisines of all time, is in fact considered British cuisine.    Cheerio.